Initially I wanted this blog to be called ‘Square Peg in a Round Hole’ because that’s how I’ve felt for most of my life, that I’m me and that’s all fine and dandy but I just never seem to have fitted in in quite the same way that other people seem to. I find social situations difficult, my anxiety can, at times, overtake me and engulf me to the point where I’ve left jobs, avoided opportunities and are left with a feeling of never quite fulfilling my ambitions.
I often feel I’m on the outside watching other people having a great time and I’m just not sure how I find my ‘great time’ without completely changing who I am or leaning rather too much on alcohol (to relax me -I’m a virtual teetotaller these days though exactly because leaning on alcohol is a road I’d rather not travel down; I know exactly where that leads to). Other people seem to fall in and out of friendships which I don’t always understand, and I have found myself asking, ‘Why is that person friends with this person? They treat them terribly!’
I don’t get people and I get peopled out easily and because of this the feeling of not quite fitting has been a constant throughout my life.
‘Square Peg in a Round Hole’ isn’t very catchy though and the domain name had already gone, plus, it doesn’t make for a snappy email address, so it really was a blessing in disguise. My husband is the tech support for our family (he’s in the industry thank goodness) and he beavered away in his study doing what it is he does, and he came up with ‘One Square Peg.’ The domain name was available, it’s great as an email address and, most of all, it means something to me.
One Square Peg is a blog about me as a neurodivergent (autistic) person trying to navigate the predominate neurotype (aka ‘neurotypical’) world. I write from my experience and my own point of view, and these may differ from other members of the neurodivergent community primarily because we aren’t all one diagnosis, we aren’t all the same and there is, as NT’s often forget, diversity within neurodiversity.